As I returned to work today after attending one session of a local conference, I had a very unexpected reaction. The speaker said nothing I had not already heard before, although he was very well spoken. But I realized as I looked over the crowd of 200+ church leaders that I felt isolated somehow.
Isolated by the never ending to-do list, by the demands of managing well, by limited time to touch others lives.
I constantly search for new blogs, websites, books anything that makes me feel connected to anything related to my position. So, in this way I stay in touch but still, I feel isolated. Maybe it is just the nature of my job. Most churches don't even have my position on staff. Director of Programming - I plan the services. Most ministries don't consider this position necessary I guess.
Because I feel this way, I delayed returning to the church, and so I sit a write... maybe what I felt at the session is that I wanted to know the attendees stories, talk to them personally. Not just listen to a speaker. I don't know why, but I had a feeling I probably could encourage some of them. Our ministry is larger than most in this area, we forget that some times. It is good to get out and gain an appreciation for what we have at Crossroads.
I love our town and am satisfied to always be here if that is what God calls me to. To do life with our Crossroads staff is an honor!
Isolated... I know it is not God's will for us to do life alone, so I guess I need to start watching for God opportunities and connect!
It has been a long time since I have seen you and I am sorry I missed you at the conference.
Thanks for sharing your heart. In my former role of programming and arts, I found myself having similar thoughts. You express my frustrations eloquently. Now in the role of executive pastor, I still find myself driven by work or tasks and relationships suffer.
We were made for connection. In between sessions and through breakouts, I had the chance to meet with some people, pray for some people and make plans to meet with some people beyond the conference.
I look forward to building relationships with some of these folk and ask God that I might be a help to them in some way.
I too will be praying that God opens my eyes to connection opportunities here and elsewhere. May God continue to bless Crossroads, your family and your ministry.
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