disrupted sleep

When my sleep is disrupted it can be any number of things:

-Vern needs to go outside
-Eating too late at night
-Snoring from dog or hubby
-Loud storm
-Bad dream

This morning at 4:00 I absolutely could no longer sleep!  Very disappointing after being in the car over 10 hours yesterday!

So I got up and made coffee and worked a little bit, knowing I would be exhausted by the end of the day with 3 meetings today and various tasks ahead of me.

As I'm winding up some work right now, I wondered if there was far more to accomplish then a couple of early morning tasks.

So I began to pray and ask the Lord to be pleased with my day.  It's amazing when we're obedient and quiet our hearts what He brings to our attention.  I'm not claiming any mystical revelation - more like an 'abiding in Him' quiet focus.

Psalm 46:10  "Be still and know that I am God..."  

I think the context of this was when God needed people to 'stop trying vainly' to accomplish and let it be obvious that this was going to be something only God could do.  It's interesting that God asks for our quietness - to step aside so He can work.

I SO want to be still enough to hear God's leading - and then to trust Him completely today!

Will you be loud, or quietly abiding today?

can't sleep

I'm sure I'm not alone right now at 4:00 a.m., not being able to sleep.  Someone else out there is longing for more hours of rest just as I am!

Although I wish I could just lay, one thing I'm not good at all is just laying there, so here I am.

These two weeks have been weeks with very little time to think.  They've been reaction weeks, when asked for help or for suggestions or for decisions, it's been an on-the-spot reactive reply everyone gets.  I'd rather be deeply in touch with those around me, part of the process, part of the collective solution instead of throwing out my own. 

On top of fast solutions the  problem is with my mid-life brain the minute a job or service or event is done -  it and all it's details are gone.  There is no time for relishing the process or dwelling in the past - instead it's always time for the next thing... immediately. My co-worker girlfriends and I joke about how there is certainly no time for pride in the accomplishment and that's a good thing, but it would be fun to at least remember some of the details.

 A confidence among our staff in one another has emerged over the past couple of years, a settling in yet still not settling for less than excellent.

There is a down-side to SLOW too, you can get stuck and not move if everything is easy, slow and not moving.  In those time I have to be careful not to find myself way too deep and for too long contemplating what should be instead of deciding what is.

The Bible talks about being still a lot.  I assume He wouldn't have talked about quite so much unless He realized what a problem it would be for us.  I picture Him looking down kind of like - ahhh excuse me....hello down there...remember me?  And with His view of eternity He just shakes his head in disbelief of what occupies my days.  He knows much of it has no connection to moving me closer to Him.

So at 4:00 a.m. this morning I confess yet again my lack of attention...being more busy with His Work...then with Him....

Goodness...you don't suppose He woke me up do you?