I accomplished a few things, nothing note-worthy, but just had this great un-focus. Maybe it's the lack of focus that comes when you have so many things that need to happen that you freeze instead of choose? So I decided to do easy things.
A load of laundry.
I cleaned my refrigerator.
Fed the birds.
Made poached eggs.
And finally, I read Matthew 1, my Bible chapter for the day. There I found myself reading the genealogy that lead to the birth of Christ.
Once again I marveled at their faith. Becoming pregnant without 'knowing' a man. Realizing she was carrying the promised Messiah.
It is completely impossibly to read God's Word and not be affected or not to re-gain heaven focus.
So today AGAIN, I submit to Him, I turn my cares over to Him, I trust Him.
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."
"I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."
Our team devotions this morning encouraged us to 'see' serving opportunities right in front of us, particularly when we get back home.
It is SO easy over here to see what needs to be done, what is the most pressing need. But how about our regular lives? So I have forced myself to begin intense prayer now that God will give me new eyes to see who I should serve and what I should give my time to back home. It is easy to focus on the 'big' events and look right past the true serving opportunities, usually individuals that may only be in front of me one time, a brief encounter, a missed opportunity. Busyness must go - and focused work must take its place.
I long to see only what God places in front of me - and no longer to be distracted by things that don't have to be done. This is my prayer - to always look with God eyes in front of me.
My daughter has a person in her life at college that is causing her grief in a work setting.She was recently sharing some of the harassing this person has been doing and I could feel the hairs on the back of my motherly neck beginning to stand up.
You just don’t mess with my kids or friends.
My usual serene exterior quickly deteriorated into what some of my family not-so-lovingly refers to as a “mama-lion”.
I become quit defensive for my loved ones (understatement).
With the shock that anyone would be less than kind to my daughter weighing heavy on me, I took it to the Lord.My intentions were noble – my flesh was weak.
After two or three lines of asking for God’s help, my mind drifted off into the possibility of taking matters into my own hands.
This without a doubt is less than pleasing to the Lord.After a few minutes of thinking through the possibilities of my involvement my focus returned to what I had originally set out to do – pray.
A few lines back into my prayer I once again found myself somehow considering the idea of sending the perpetrator a letter expressing my great disappointment in his behavior.Rehearsing what I might write in great detail in my mind…finally the return of helplessness came back over me and I turned back to the Lord.
I kid you not, 5 minutes back into prayer I returned again to yet another scenario, this time picturing my self confronting them on the college campus.Now, let’s just picture that in our minds for a moment.ME confronting a college student I don’t even know – which would completely undercut my daughter’s authority, and would require that I actually be confrontational (can you say chicken?)
Anyway, by the end of the time which should have been a hallowed time of coming to my Lord asking Him to intercede, I highly doubt He was even listening.I can just picture Him leaning in to hear my prayer 3 times, and finally giving up and turning His focus toward someone else.(I know, bad theology)
Anyway – am I the only one that has trouble remaining focused in prayer?
Work = details for the weekend finished Directors meeting filing done phone calls returned gone!
next...... Milliron recycling - pink hardhat just for me! scrap for our stars for the Christmas set design at Crossroads preparing for the artists to create stars on Tuesday
home.....ironing done more Christmas cards written volunteers Christmas gifts done
I LOVE variety. This can be good and this can be very bad. Focus is necessary to accomplish GREAT things.
Focus is necessary to mature and learn. Focus is necessary to hear and understand when God speaks.
I confess, focus is not one of my greatest attributes.
FOCUS - to concentrate: to focus one's thoughts.
To focus one's thoughts...I have wasted a lot of time in my life feeling guilty about a lack of concentration, feeling guilty about a lack of accomplishment in the stereo-typical way, feeling like I need to work twice as hard as everyone else to get anywhere.
I am so thankful NOW to be in a place where my talents can be used, where people truly care about me and where I want to be. I feel close to God there. I feel surrounded by friends there and I even get to be with my husband there. God is so good.
We each bring something unique to the plate, we each are created by a Sovereign God, we each happened on purpose - even if our earthly creation was considered an accident!
I love the variety in my life and I look forward to all the many things God will once again bring into my life tomorrow!
In my study this morning, I studied one of the most encouraging passages in Scripture.
Hebrews 12:1-3 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.
Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.
He endured this so I would not give up! Wow! Certainly nothing I have ever gone through comes close to this sacrifice God gave.
My study went on to discuss how we can sometimes be chasing meaningless "maturity practices" or goals that can take our focus completely off of Jesus himself. This was freeing to me, described my continuous discouragement at failed trys! Looking to Jesus, abide in Him is all He asks, no lists, no trying to live up to others expectations!
Spiritual disciplines are good things, striving to mature spiritually is a good thing, but then the author of my study went on to say this; "perhaps spiritual growth is actually as simple and natural as breathing, when our focus is on Jesus and not on the breathing itself..." profound!
He calls me to just be focused on Him, when my eyes focus elsewhere I become easily discouraged. I love Him, I live for Him, I trust Him and I pledge my focus and life purpose to Him!! Chasing maturity simply leads me into His arms.
I had no focus. 
