Thursday, May 31, 2012

no words to write

I have been absent the past few days because all my words got used up within my work.  I had no words to write, so I didn't.

I missed it though.

Writing to me is private even though I share it, my thoughts, my desires for maturity and requests for additional grace pour out here.  There are times I feel I would surely explode without writing.  And so most days I write.

It takes little effort to empty my thoughts onto paper or into cyberspace, but these past few days and nights have been so full of other detail there was no extra time for thought, no extra words to say.

Soon there will be more words than I can possibly write.

I am moving toward one of the most incredible 2 weeks of my life-  in Cambodia, I am trying to prepare well, organize my thoughts to share with you, and I pray that I can some how open the doors for you to see deeply into another part of the world in a way that brings the experience alive for all of you.

Please pray for our team and for the next weeks of preparation.  So far we have learned the dances we need to know to dance with the beautiful children, received the shots that we need to receive in order to protect us from disease and now we pray and rest and try to wrap our heads around the amazing opportunities that lay ahead.  Due to the particularly large group of Crossroads members going - prepare for our ministry to change.  It will.  It is about to become an extraordinary time in Crossroads history...I really believe the best is yet to come!

Thank you for reading.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

a crazy laugh

I just got done trying to clean up my makeup as a result of laughing harder then I have in as long as I can remember!!

I was talking to a good friend who teased me about repeating everything they said.  I didn't even realize I was doing it and burst into laughter at my self!!

When I think of all the times I've totally lost it laughing, I think most of the time it's been over something dumb I've done!  I find myself quite ridiculous and love laughing with my friends so much!!

God knew it would bring his children enjoyment to laugh together and a release from tensions and worry, and a connection to other!

Laugh this weekend with your friends and family, even at your own expense!!


Psalm 126:2 

Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, “The Lord has done great things for them.”

Job 8:21 

He will yet fill your mouth with laughter, and your lips with shouting.          





Friday, May 25, 2012

not afraid of old

I can honestly say, I'm not afraid of being old.

BUT the process of BECOMING old is annoying.

Lately my biggest symptom is forgetfulness.  Repeating every story at least 5 times to the same unfortunate people.  The glassy looks that cross their faces as they try to be patient signal it's time to be quiet and move on to new material.

My doctor at my well exam this year said, "Get used to it - it's an actual characteristic of mid-life for women especially."  Great!

So for now I'll try to begin each story with, "Have I already told you this..." and pray the patience of my closest friends and relatives can tolerate my forgetfulness.

I have to wonder why as a woman begins to change later in life - that God designed this to be something we experience?  Interesting to consider.  I wonder what good can possibly come of it?  Maybe it keeps me  humble?  More considerate of others struggles?  Maybe it just makes me think twice before I speak!

Whatever the reason is, God designed me as I am so I accept that I'm aging - and I'll give my best shot to do so gracefully!

Now, what was I doing.....




Thursday, May 24, 2012

swallowed by stillness

I have been sitting completely motionless outside and was immediately swallowed by glorious silence for a handful of long summer moments.  A deep exhale and rest has begun.

It is crazy when you sit out this time of the night, you can literally watch it become dark.  Minute by minute it darkens until the earth also rests.

The silence was finally broken by a sudden burst of air through the trees in the woods that lay behind us.  So God broke His own silence - I didn't - how awesome and how unusual.

Maybe I resist stillness because of what it reveals.

The heart and all it longs to reveal is not known in noise, it can stay hidden and unknown for as long as the noise continues. Silence the noise and all is exposed.

Exposure is good.  It allows healing and cleansing and forces honesty.  Only then are we changed.

It seems a contradiction that the same God that wants me to seek rest in Him created this busy mind of mine that constantly struggles to focus and rest.  Ever moving on to something new while wishing to remain in the familiar just a little longer.  He uses my weakness and in it He is glorified - not in my strength for my strength is something I have created and it's false and wanes constantly and then is gone.

Thankfully He takes me as I am and holds me with nail scarred hands - His strength is enough to make even the stillness powerful and fulfilling and transforming.









Wednesday, May 23, 2012

bad things

Yesterday I heard some disturbing news...really bad things.

A young lady burst into tears as she told me she had been recently raped.

How do you respond to something like that??  Nothing fully prepares you for these conversations, or how to respond in that type of situation.

The wrong things to say, in my opinion are some of the Christian cliches such as...

  • God is in control
  • We go through hard things for a purpose
  • In the end God will use this
  • Just trust God
  • We live in a fallen world

Don't get me wrong, I believe these things, but some of the worst experiences with believers that I personally have had over the years were due to awkward timing and misplaced comments.

Best to just be quiet.

I feel our responsibility is simply to listen, make sure they have access to professionals who can help them and then to gently guide them toward God over time.  The time will come when they will once again be receptive to His goodness!  And with help, the time will come when they can relate and help others who have been through similar things - but that is way down the road.

Meanwhile - make them feel cared for, check on them and encourage them.  

God can take the bad things, the ugliest of circumstance and turn it glorious - that is what I feel our obligation is to do -

help them eventually walk back into the glorious...

Monday, May 21, 2012

my day off

I've been in my #1 favorite spot twice today...my deck.

Early this morning it was organizing the day, promoting some coming events at Crossroads, organizing some meals for a recovering member of the Magnification team and an email to a ministry leader elsewhere.

Then to the dentist.  WAY overdue for an examine  - but, "Look Ma no cavities!"  Even as I sat in that chair I gave thanks as they reported - great blood pressure and no indication of any kind of gum disease or of oral cancer!  God is good!

I felt I deserved a trip to my favorite store Gabriel Brothers following the dentist - my husband tried so hard to be patient, and I think he bought more for himself than I did.  The difference - he was done in 15 minutes, me...not so much!

The second time on the deck - my time!  Bloggin' - obviously,  as I inhale the delicious fragrance of chicken on the grill- these are the things that make a great day off!

I have several people waiting for articles that I would love to knock out tonight...but, not so sure if I'll get to them or not.  That's the beauty of a true day off - you get to decide what comes next, what burns up your day.



My day is going quickly - but as storm clouds begin to gather I breath deeply and slowly and thank Him for peaceful decks and my husband and our family and our amazing friends and for days off ... and for chicken...


Where is your favorite spot on your days off?




Sunday, May 20, 2012

weekend report

Sometimes simple is best.  And God blessed us with a simply excellent weekend.  Seriously, our volunteers work their hearts out to make the services as excellent as humanly possible- week after week!  And the services this weekend showed what hard work can produce - excellence and the 'look' of simplicity.  No distractions, just focused work that pointed everyone in attendance toward the throne!

I talked to young and old alike who were so glad they had come to participate in worship both in song as well as a magnificent teaching by Pastor Tim as he began the teaching series STORIES of Jesus.  We were all blessed!

Our setlist:

Everyone (Praises) - Gateway
I Will Follow -           Tomlin
Revelation Song -      Gateway
Holy, Holy, Holy (Savior and King)
Message:  Stories of Jesus Pt. 1  (John 1:43-51)  Sr Pastor Tim Armstrong
Closing Special:  The Same Love - Baloche

To watch this weekend's services on Monday go to www.crossroadswired.com    You can watch all of our archived services anytime.  Download the Crossroads App for even easier access.

To see what other ministries included in their weekend services go to www.theworshipcommunity.com


Thursday, May 17, 2012

are you generous


I am often surprised by people's generosity.

We recently received some anonymous donations made in our name to help us with our trip to Cambodia.  Amazingly generous!  A complete surprise!

I have been overwhelmed at how generous friends have been to our kids as well- a car, and 2 living room furniture sets among many other things given to them!  Unbelievably generous!

And just tonight as we sat in a restaurant talking to an old friend, I received a generous offer to "see what he can do" for an event I'm overseeing.  So very generous!

Makes me ask myself - am I generous?

Sometimes  - not always.

 Giving for the wrong reasons completely negates the giving in the first place!  Generosity is not measured or based on how much you give away or help others, it's measured in attitude.

What is the attitude with which you give?

Do you give out of obligation?  pride?  to be noticed and appreciated?  only when it doesn't require a true sacrifice? At times I have given out of each of these wrong attitudes, which makes my giving worthless...

God doesn't need my help or generosity.  I need it...I need to be generous in order to be obedient and to gain an understanding that things and money are just a means to provide for the needs of others and to further His Kingdom.

So, would you say you are generous?


Tuesday, May 15, 2012

what I learned today

I was reminded again this morning just how important it is to give God time each day - focused time for study and prayer.   It is always amazing -  spending time with Him.

Why would I ever put other things before Him ?  There is no justification - even 'working' for Him is not what He values most.  He wants our undivided attention - a little bit of my 24 hours is the least I can give.

Perhaps this rendering is similar to the boat John was transported in ... no luxury liner for sure!
Today I read in Revelation - the story of John as a very elderly man being banished to the island of Patmos.  He was transported in a rough boat of some kind - no comfort for an elderly man bouncing around on wooden seats -

John had options.  Die a disappointed grumbling old man - or seek 'why' God sent him here.  If he had become bitter and turned from God he would have never had the revelation that God was about to give Him.

How much do I miss because I become discouraged and focus on the difficulties?  I can't even begin to image how much...embarrassing.

Complaining, being negative toward others, focusing on the 'why me' will cause us as believers to miss the most important revelations God has for us.  Clouds always represent times that our faith will be strengthened if we keep our focus on Him.

My prayer today is to watch for God's leading all day long.  No minute of our day is uncovered by God's plans for us - join me in staying open to Him today.   How exciting to have another day in the Lord!!


Monday, May 14, 2012

my day off

My day off was spent cleaning and washing and cooking.  Catching up at home as well as preparing for guests tonight.

We finally had several amazing Crossroad-ians over for dinner who have helped my hubby with his events the past few years !  What a blessing to hear them tell how and when they began to attend Crossroads and just laugh and get to know one another.  Now when we pass in the busyness of the weekend - we will know one another just a little bit more!

I think I ate more on Mother's Day and today then I have in the past 2 weeks combined...not good.  I think it is time for me to watch my consumption...feeling very over-fed and glutenous!  I'll work on that tomorrow.

I have a big week ahead of me so with this oh so little post - I bid you all good-night!  May God grant you  a restful night my friends!




Sunday, May 13, 2012

weekend report

OH MY GOODNESS - the youth at Crossroads not only lead us in amazing worship - but demonstrated complete excellence and diligence in their preparation - the way they lead was so expressive it was OBVIOUS they personally knew the Savior that they sang about!

And for the first time ever - our 4th and 5th grade band lead our first song

Our setlist:

Blessed Be The Name - lead by our 4th and 5th grade band
Lay Me Down - Passion
White Flag - Tomlin
Mighty To Save - Laura Story
Yaweh - Passion
Stories of Jesus - Series Promo
Announcements - Intern, Amanda Wiggens
Message:  Baby Dedication -  Family Ministries Director: Jeanette Chase
                 Graduation Recognition

To watch this service on Monday go to www.crossroadswired.com

To see what other ministries used in their worship services go to www.theworshipcommunity.com




4 & 5th grade band kicking!  Noah the amazing bass player!

Mia on the drum kit!

middle school and high schoolers leading worship!

Great leadership

Saturday, May 12, 2012

so many new things

I am SO excited about all the new things at Crossroads!  One of the most exciting is the upgrade of the Coffee House!

All you young adults out there - PLEASE join us at Crossroads next Tuesday night in the Coffee House for a 'soft open'!

There will be all your favorite speciality coffees and amazing brand new teas available for purchase!

Come bring computers, a good book, a deck of cards or just you and your friends  - and hang out next Tuesday evening at Crossroads Coffee House - 1188 Park Avenue West, from 7:00 - 10:00.

There will be some live acoustic music and EVERYONE will be there!  EVERYONE!!


Friday, May 11, 2012

my amazing parents

Tonight we had a very high privilege.

We got to celebrate the fact that my parents have been together for 55 years.  That is nothing short of amazing!  And, they still adore one another!

When God sits in the middle of a marriage - it lasts.

They have been blessed with a quality of life that few experience - no debilitating health issues - and no lack of activeness.

But most of all their lives point everyone toward the Savior and I am so in love with them and proud of them I can hardly speak of it.  I adore them both equally!!

It was fun to give them their Keurig and to sit and fellowship with family.  We ARE SO blessed and grateful!




Thursday, May 10, 2012

1 step forward - 2 steps back

This title sums up my day.

I started off the week feeling highly organized and like I was making progress - moving forward a step at a time.

But today was a different story - at least 2 steps back.

I don't know why...things I felt were well under way heading toward completion just kind of fizzled out and stopped.  Disappointing.  Ever have a day like that?

Always when things fall apart I examine myself first, always.  Did I do everything I should have?  Am I the cause of the problem?  What can I do if anything to solve it?  Some times it is my fault, some times it isn't, it doesn't make it much easier either way.

And then the evening came.

Line dancing - 1 step forward and 2 steps back.  The description of my day came alive right in front of me.

I met with the team leaving soon for Cambodia to learn line dances so that we can dance with the orphans when we go next month.

How ironic that the movement of my feet preparing to 'go' - made the very pattern that described my day so well.


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

fallen soldiers = no mothers day

I was saddened tonight when the news gave the details of several funerals for soldiers fallen in war.

The TV pictures of these brave, handsome young men in the prime of their life made it very difficult to believe they were actually gone.  I think in both cases it was a road-side bomb that cut their lives short.

The day these men left for the service was a day that probably brought great worry and constant concern to their mother's lives.  But I would guess you never really believe it can happen to you...the loss of a young son passing before you do.  Horrifying.

No happy Mother's Day this year...or maybe ever again...

As we approach mother's day this week, I couldn't help but pray for the moms of these two men.  How different their weekend will be this year - all because of the evil and hatred that fills this fallen world.

It made me ask myself if I really believe what I say - "that my children belong to the Lord"?  I've heard those words come out of my mouth before.

Do I mean what I say - or are they mine all mine!?

Sunday on Mother's Day, please join me in praying for the Mother's without their fallen children.

Monday, May 7, 2012

my day off

I fell back to sleep today and slept until almost 10:00 a.m.!  Good grief - half the day almost gone!  Oh well it's My Day Off! Woo Hoo!

After all that sleep I swear I hit the ground running full blast - within an hour I had all my winter clothes transferred to an upstairs closet  and another closet organized and laundry in.




Soon after that we were on our way to meet up with family to talk, eat, move in more boxes, watched our son's music video, made my favorite cookies - the Chinese cookies they used to make at Gene's bakery and sat down to watch The Voice.

Looking back I have to ask - was their eternal significance anywhere in my day?

Yes, yes, yes!  More than some of my 'church' workdays!

Rest.
Mark 6:31   And He Said to Them, "Come away by yourselves to a lonely place and rest a while."  For there were many people coming and going, and they did not even have time to eat.


God created rest...that seventh day he spoke of it.

Organized closets and my home.
I Corinthians 14:40  But everything should be done in a fitting and orderly way.


Not trying to take scripture out of context - but the Bible is never random or unorganized - always purposeful and heading somewhere specific...organized.

Spent the day with my hubby and extended family!

Genesis 2:24   Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Psalm 127:3-5   Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him. Children born to a young man are like arrows in a warrior's hands. How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them! He will not be put to shame when he confronts his accusers at the city gates.

I am truly, truly blessed!  Even the most simple day is His!!





Sunday, May 6, 2012

weekend report

It was a fabulous weekend.  Pastor Tim challenged us to love our enemies -  he demonstrated this by taping an interview with the President of the Islamic Society of Mansfield who he has recently formed a friendship with.  It was a lesson our congregation won't soon forget!

Our setlist:
No One Like You - Crowder
Revive Us Again - Big Daddy Weave
The Only One - Passion
All Because of the Cross - Baloche
Yahweh - Passions
Message:  Christianity and Islam - Pt. 4 - Sr. Pastor Tim Armstrong
Exit Song:  Yahweh

To see what other ministries used in their worship service go to www.theworshipcommunity.com


Video Director Garrett peaks around the corner among his multiple video screens with CG operator Sue !

Worship leader Dan with the amazing praise team

Pastor Tim received a gift of Jelly Bellies from Mike our sound assistant

Milo and the boys leading us in worship!

LIttle Annie came with her mommy one of the praise team members!

Dan with his lone jelly bean...




Saturday, May 5, 2012

saturday skype blessings

There is no greater blessing then to begin a day seeing and talking to the children in Cambodia that families at Crossroads support.

To watch parents bring their young children to Skype with the orphan they personally support moves me more than I can explain.

The opportunity to teach your children our responsibility to care for others around the world by SEEING and TALKING with them personally is beyond anything I experienced in the church as a child.  The children being raised by families at Crossroads that have 'adopted' a brother or sister from across the world can teach  responsibility in ways that missionaries never had the chance to do in the past.

Angie Mahek, a Praise Team member and our Shelby House Church pastor's wife and hostess , came walking in to the Skype event at Crossroads this morning with her 4 girls in tow.  It was precious to watch!

The girl they support sang the words "Worthy is the Lamb..." to them.  Oh My Goodness - the orphans teach us so much about mercy, and care and about appreciating the gift that Jesus Christ is to each of us!

Here is the song being sung from the lips of an orphan now in the care of Asia's Hope and supported by Angie's family.




And as if that wasn't enough - then to watch a big strong fully grown man - near tears, making 'heart' shapes with his huge hands to the little ones.....I lost it!



That perhaps is the best example I can think of to demonstrate the change that happens to us when we participate in serving others.  Regard for ourselves disappears, we don't care what others may think.  We know with confidence what God has called us to do.  And for our children....it's a life lesson they'll never forget.


Friday, May 4, 2012

I sit and watch

I love to sit and watch many things, clouds, people, storms, but one of my favorites have always been birds!

I used to read every book I could borrow from the library about them, I used to sit in my bedroom on our family's second floor beside my window - eye level to a very tall tree.  There I would sit for hours and sketch the birds.  I don't know what happened to my sketches.

Birds all by themselves would single-handedly convince me there is a Creator.  They are fascinating and self-sufficient and meticulously detailed and they sing to the King daily!

Tonight just before sunset - cardinals ate at our bird feeder.  It's a feeder with a very tiny perch.  I wondered if they could stay on the perch.  They did.  They used their tails to balance their weight - with quick flicks it counter balanced the sway the wind caused.  An amazing design.

Why would the creator of the world care about such detail?  And then why would He allow me to see it ?

My guess is that He loves it when we appreciate His handiwork - when His attention to such detail causes me to Worship Him.

I love Him and I praise Him for all He shows me each day.  His is my Father and the Creator of billions and billions of detail that points me toward Him.


Job 12:7-10 (ESV)

“But ask the beasts, and they will teach you;
    the birds of the heavens, and they will tell you;
or the bushes of the earth, and they will teach you;
    and the fish of the sea will declare to you.
Who among all these does not know
    that the hand of the Lord has done this?
10 In his hand is the life of every living thing
    and the breath of all mankind.











Wednesday, May 2, 2012

test results are back


My EEG came back normal.  

No further testing required, the only remaining evidence of the seizure is - no driving.

I wanted to thank you for all of your faithful prayers.  

I have always heard it said that you don't know how many friends you have until you need something.  And friends appeared out of the woodwork the past few weeks as many called, and wrote and prayed.

It is humbling to feel physically vulnerable - deep down inside we all feel infallible at times that is until  bad health hits - it's quite a reality check.

Hebrews 4:9
So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God.

I now LONG to experience sabbath in Christ.  The true sabbath was not just a rest one day in seven but involved a complete change of life.  In Him we have a Sabbath that never ends.  We are living the sabbath rest, well, at least we are supposed to be.  I am determined with the Lord's help to demonstrate a more balanced life.
I remember hearing leaders I looked up to in the past talk about how they ran too hard until they began to experience weakness of one kind or another that slowed them down.  That moved them to a Godly pace.

There are many ways to be a Godly example - perhaps the most Godly among us simply have a better understanding of what God intended for our bodies and minds to be capable of.  They know how and when to rest.  And their Godliness comes as a reward of slower pace.  

Perhaps when Jesus says, "Follow Me"  He means just that.              Follow....don't pass.