Saturday, May 24, 2014

emotional week

I've been in a bit of a writing funk this week, dealing with lots of emotions…

Mourning…sitting with Gary and Carol Harris at Hospice…and surprised yesterday by another old Crossroads friend's death….and yet it definately brings perspective
Missing….missing my daughter and son-in-law like crazy all of a sudden
Loss….of Pastor Tim and family
Loving….amazed at how deep my love runs for my family and girlfriends
Praising… praising God for provision in ministry as well as finally enjoying being home a little more
Thankful..that God is in control and I don't have to take on trying to make sense of details
Anticipating…we have college interns arriving next week for the first time at Crossroads
Determined…  I've never felt as driven and responsible as I do now
Excited….when there is an ending there is always a new beginning

I feel surrounded by God's army and I can't imagine moving forward alone!   My heart has been deeply, deeply burdened for those outside the Lord lately.   I can't imagine the helplessness they must feel.   I'm burdened also for people who know the Lord but have chosen to step into sin, knowing their own decisions separate them from Him…how lonely they must be.

So I ask the Lord - how do I help them, how do I even know who they are?

My heart feels close to God this morning - yet feeling very far from where I long to be spiritually.

 I would assume that puts me right where He wants me.

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